The Middle Distance

"One by one, the meerkats' heads popped out of their tunnels. They had heard some amazing sounds from outside their little meerkat manor that evening and night. More to the point, breakfast hadn't arrived. In silent agreement, they all slid out and stood in adorable vigilance, waiting for the most important event of the day, with all the concentration their hazelnut-sized brains could summon.

At last, their favorite zookeeper was opening their enclosure. The friendly little beasts dashed over.

The zookeeper had tears in his eyes as he put down the bowls of fruit and mealworms. "It's chaos out there, kids...they say God took all the believers to heaven...looked more like they were getting sucked up by flying saucers to me...the gay bars are handing out free drinks, the Assembly of God megachurch got taken over by a feminist day-care center, the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and the Satanists are going door to door for new converts, and me...I'm...free! Free at last! Now we are all free!" Solemnly, he removed a set of meerkat ears from his pocket, removed his zookeeper's hat, and put them on.

And they all lived happily ever after."